Nocebo
by Life-Could-Be-This
Summary: AU. As tragedy strikes Sasuke's life, all the pieces get tossed in the air. Everything seem to centre around his brother, the one he abandoned and in turn was abandoned by. Still Sasuke can't help but be pulled in by the strange gravity Itachi excludes.


Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the plot...

Warnings: This fic contains slash, don't like don't read. And on top of that incest, more precisely Uhichacest. And mature content. So if you feel like any of this might offend you, please leave. You have been officially warned.

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Prologue

The bright flashes from the police car light's lit up the night that had been filled with darkness and drenched in blood. The change between electric blue and bright red, those colours would always mark Sasuke's two greatest fears.

The heavy rain muffled the voices that registered past his numbness. Sasuke was soaked, but he had still refused the blankets trust at him. They swarmed around him, hovering with pity shining in their eyes. He had always been a target for pity. He had never liked it and now it was choking him. The world around him altered steadily between blue and red, cold and hot.

He blocked out the questions directed at him. The answers were there in his mind, shimmering just below the surface, but Sasuke didn't want to reach for them. It was a childish wish to hope for bad things to vanish if you didn't acknowledge them. Anger coursed through him – no, it was better not to feel, not to remember. The questions became more insistent, trying to break the walls Sasuke set up to separate himself from the world, the hurt. Someone laid a hand on Sasuke's shoulder in an attempt to catch his attention. The world flashed blue and the touch brought back the memory of another. Sasuke quickly shook the hand off but the memory kept flooding back. You could build up walls to keep the world outside but they would not help against what's already inside.

He remembered the heavy rumbling sound that seemed to move the very earth. The air felt thick, oppressing even. Sasuke's heart was hammering in his chest, his pulse echoing inside his head. The silence that fell shortly after was deafening, no noise could be heard and Sasuke was sure the whole world stood still.

Then a loud crack breaking the stillness and a electric flash lighting everything in a ghostly blue sheen. The clap of thunder that followed brought the noise back and the world started moving again, this time heavy downpour was accompanied by frantic screams. The suddenness startled his already scared mind, but not as much as when he registered the screams bouncing of the walls, that came from his own throat. The rumbling started again and the panic started to spread.

He remembered the arms that enveloped him, the hands that lightly stroked his trembling shoulders. The warm breath against his ear and the low voice turned out the storm. The curtain of soft hair around his face, shielding him from the world. He remembered...

No – those hands had been good, the voice kind and it's wielder had been a paragon. What ha been was as it should be, the person couldn't be... _No, don't think! You'll wake up soon from this nightmare._

A flash of red and Sasuke could feel it on his hands. Warm and wet, seeping into his clothes. There was too much of it, pools on the polished floor and Sasuke realised nothing could ever clean this house. Glossy orbs in grotesque masks met his eyes, shining like dark jewels on pale cloth. A morbid fascination filled his mind – the kind that makes it impossible to turn your gaze away from an impending train-wreck. No matter how clear the outcome, you have to watch and make sure, giving no heed to the sickness bubbling inside you.

The hair on Sasuke's neck stood up his whole body tensing. It was like someone had pressed pause on an old VCR-machine, the picture cracking with static. It was tangible in the air, a pressure pooling at the base of his neck. Sasuke could feel a shiver race up his spine and then the world started moving again as if on high speed only to slow down and focus on one person. It felt like the world was thrown off from its axis when the key character of this sordid tale entered the stage.

The man was tall with long black hair and he moved with an effortless grace, making it look like he was a part of an elaborate dance with everyone else struggling to keep up. Sasuke wanted to run away, wanted to reach out but he was rooted on the spot. A breeze swayed the silken curtain of hair that hid a pair of piercing eyes he had felt burning into him just seconds ago.

Sasuke was still transfixed, waiting for the other to make a move. However he was only presented with a retreating backside while an irrational panic started to well inside him. He needed to reach him before it was too late, before he was gone. He wouldn't be ignored this time.

Sasuke took one hesitant step forward just as the dark haired man turned around. In that same moment the world flashed red, the light reflecting in the eyes staring straight at him. In that heartbeat Sasuke found himself staring right into those seemingly blood-red eyes. These eyes he knew well, but to Sasuke they had always remained lifeless, impassive. Now he could read on array of emotions swirling in those endless looking orbs. He expected to be seared with a heated anger, but he could find no traces of it. They were filled with bitterness, accusing him with betrayal. Sasuke felt it stabbing at his heart, confused but knowing he was in the right, the one betrayed. The eyes held inside sadness, frustration and loneliness, and for a moment Sasuke wanted to reach out, offer anything he had. But he knew better, his own anger rushing to the surface, hatred and betrayal.

Sasuke waited for the reflecting flash of hatred but none came. Those glowing orbs were filled an air of sad surrender he could not understand. He did not want to understand.

A blink of his eyes and the world was once again bathing in a blue light. Sasuke sought out the eyes once more, this time looked cold as ice, sucking in the blue light. Those were the eyes he knew; cold and without life. He had always wondered if there were emotions behind those calculating orbs, now he knew. Whatever had passed the second before had been nothing but an illusion, a trick of light.

A second blink and the man had turned away again, getting into the waiting car. He was ignored once again by the other, he was always the one left behind and now the only one.

Sasuke allowed the hatred build up in him, boil over and burn its way through his eyes into the oblivious target. Sasuke's fist clenched in his hand, he never wanted to see the other man again, the traitor.

Yes, the traitor, the murderer. His aniki.

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A/N: So this is a new story I started writing. I'd be interested in your opinion about it, I know there isn't much to go on yet but if you liked it let me know and I'll continue posting it here. Any kind of criticism is welcome, I don't take offence in case you can tell what needs improving etc. Thanks for reading!

Life Could Be This


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